Every Rich Man Is Handsome:
Before you join me in psycho-analyzing the issue of a manâs âbeautyâ being subject to the weight of his pocket, letâs get one thing straight: Money is sexy as hell. Yes, I said so. A while ago, if someone made the same statement and I heard it, I would look at them with disdain, while thinking to myself: âwhat a shallow somebodyâ âŚand naturally, I would roll my eyesâŚ very heavily too.
But, yeahâŚI see the light now.
Believe it or not, having money is a game changer for anyone: man or woman. But I guess for men, itâs a more dramatic change. No? Have you ever seen the throw back pictures of some Nigerian celebrities who are kind of sex symbols now? Tu face? Flavour? They looked dried up, hungry and excruciatingly unpleasant to the eyesâŚ compared to the way they look now. What is the difference between then and now? Did their facial features change? Did they take some magical pill that made them look hotter than they used to? No. they didnât. Their âbeautyâ came with the money they acquired when they âblewâ! I meanâŚexcept for maybe Bobrisky who went on to bleach and now wears fabulous weaves and wigs, most of these celebrities did not really do anything extra to their looks. They just became handsome and sexy because they gained wealth.
Agreed, there are some who even with the wealth, they still look ugly AFâŚthey know it, we know itâŚ but nobody ever mentions it. In fact, they are used as yardsticks for âhandsomenessâ and âbeing dapperâ. Why? They have the money!
Yesterday, a close friend asked: âNkem, be honest, would you rather an ugly man with an annual income of 500 million Naira or a handsome man who is unemployed or undecided at his career path?â It was a tricky one, so I asked further questions for clarification: âwhen you say ugly, do you mean repulsive or just not good-looking?â âhmmmâŚnot good-lookingâ he said. âHmmnnnâŚand both are the same age?â I continued, and he says âYes, both 32â. With the extra questions answered, I did not hesitate. I straightaway said: âIâd go for the Ugly one.â. My friend (clearly shocked since Iâm a huge champion of equal love for âstrugglingâ men) yelled: âLiar! Even if he looks like âa certain president Nigeria once hadâ?â and I said: âYES! What do you mean? That dude is super intelligent and sexy! Have you read any of his books?â Of course, that was me trying to be funny, but my âyesâ was a certain yes.
Before you judge me any further (because I know you are already doing that), let me walk you through my thought process and how it was easy to pick the ugly rich man. The way I see it, being wealthy or having a huge income is a product of extreme hard work, huge efforts, and sacrifices made in the past by themselves or their families. The man who makes the annual income of 500 million Naira is rich not just because he has money, he is rich because he did something in the past to grow, to maintain money. He has was intelligent, focused, purposeful and tenacious. The handsome man, on the other hand, what did he do to earn his looks? What effort did he put in? Genetics? Proper grooming? Is that it?
Again, âhandsomenessâ is a depreciating value while wealth is appreciating value. Looks and unnecessary charm in a man will give butterflies, sweet heartburn and all that goofy nonsense that makes life seem enjoyableâŚbut that handsomeness fades with time and circumstancesâŚand along with it the heady feelings and emotions. That is a certainty.
A man who has successfully earned a considerable amount of money is likely to be more financially smart and plan futuristically. His value usually will appreciate with time, and even if he fails or experiences difficulties at some point, there is the high probability that he has what it takes to rise back up again. Considering these remote implication makes it easy to see pick the ugly man.
Basically, the amount of money a man has kind of determines how valuable and how âhandsomeâ he appears.